Sick without anxiety

Ginger water

I’m sick again. After having some minor symptoms last week, eye infection and sore throat mainly, it hit me viciously yesterday and I feel so disappointed in a way. It’s only two weeks until our holiday and I don’t want time off work now. I mean financially, but also work wise it’s difficult. It’s not the end of the world though and me stressing out about it doesn’t help.

You know what else, I almost feel like I don’t deserve to go on holiday if I haven’t pushed through and worked all the way to the end. What is this silly feeling? 

Also I hear all these people in my head, you know the ones that always want to comment how long since they were sick and that they never get sick or if they do they wouldn’t let that keep them away from home, they’d just take pain pills and show up at work. You know, those people. What they and their useless, non-applicable to me opinions are doing making themselves reminded in my life when I’m sick – I dunno.

It’s not like I don’t push through, I do. But why is that such a valued quality, then? To know your limits, take care of your health when your sick shows humility. To not drag a cold to the workplace shows you’re a considerate person. Surely, that should be valued qualities?

Still, I feel anxious about being sick again.

Ms Robot
Ms Robot. Evelyn rushed to my computer when she came home from day care and started “typing” away.
Ms Robot
She managed to bring out the Console.

Invisalign expectations vs reality

So I’ve had my Invisaligns for 6 months now and I thought I’d share some thoughts. Thoughts that I had before starting the treatment and how I think about it now.


Expectation: It must be much better to be able to take your trays out to eat, compared to having rails in all the time.

Reality: It’s actually a bit weird to eat with the trays out as I expect it is with rails. Mainly because I have all these attachments on but also because your teeth are moving and the bite is changing. Also you don’t want to have your trays out for very long so you have to plan your eating a lot more, and brush your teeth and trays afterward.


Expectation: I’ll lose so much weight when not being able to have the trays out for longer than 2 hours a day which must include eating and brushing teeth/tray.

Reality: Nope, haven’t lost anything. Still manages to eat my calories apparently…


Something else is how designed the moving process is of the teeth, in my case on of the front teeth are moving up and overlapping the other to push out the tooth that has been hidden behind. And when they’re all even they’ll be pushed back as a row. It’s amazing, not sure that you can move your teeth like that with rails.

Maybe, but I’m speculating here, that’s why the Invisalign process is so much faster. I mean I would have had to have rails for 2-3 years, but my current Invisalign treatment is expected to take about 10 months (could take longer though). And I’ve passed 6 months now, so yaay!

Rest days & leg days

I’ve been really tired this weekend and had some not so nice symptoms of that. Have you ever experienced that? Vertigo, ringing ears, eye sight loss…? I also had anger issues… I guess it’s the body trying really hard to tell me to calm down.

But all I have to trade right now in is stuff I do for me, which is not fair or right. Like working out, I had an every other day thing going on, but I skipped running all weekend cause I need my physical energy to survive. Exercising is stress relief, but it is also tiring for the body. It’s such a hard choice to make though, what it is I really need right then. Sunday I slept for like 2hrs in the middle of the day to. And went to bed super early.

Today I made a choice to go to the gym for the first time in ages and do legs and a run before going home. So I took a few days off and today I did more than usual. Hopefully that won’t set me back in my tiredness. I also have hip ache but that’s another story, going to a naprapath on Friday. :-)

Enough whining right… I’m going on a lovely holiday soon, just need to push through.

Work is really fun at the moment as I’m building a prototype in Vuejs (with typescript). There’s no backend so I’m having to type up a lot of mock data in the application, but that’s ok. Once it’s in place, which it should be tomorrow I can start playing around for real with work flows and clever solutions. Tomorrow I’m also doing a requirement workshop with two groups at my assignment, might be interesting.

What does a programmer look like?

I went for a run on my lunch break today as well, I’ve been on a every other day thing for a couple of weeks now and I didn’t really wanna break it, but to be honest, I think I might have needed another rest day coz my hips are kind of hurting. I’m limping around at work. I did try and take it very easy and stretch a lot, but I don’t know if that’s a good idea coz I’m over flexible…

At my current assignment you always see people running during lunch breaks and in the summer you see classes outside. There’s mostly engineers where I am now, but I seem to think I’ve noticed this in the developer world too. People get out and move. The old stereotypes of the immobile basement programmer living off junk food and jolt is dead, well it should be.

Physical activity and smartness is scientifically proven to be linked, so anyone interested in coming up with tricky, clever and creative solutions need to realise this.

A programmer could also look like this awesome Victoria Secret’s model and be an amazing developer with ridiculous amount of Stack overflow points. Lyndsey Scott;

This is also what a programmer could look like

Capetown

We’re going to Capetown soon, in just a few weeks time actually. I’m starting to get nervous, but also excited of course. Jon and I was there 8 years ago, lots have happened since then and this will be a totally different trip.

I look forward to the weather, the scenery, the food and some shopping I expect.

I think we’ll get up to a lot more touristy things this time around. Last time was mostly socializing and there’ll be some of that as well of course.

South Africa
Last time we were in South Africa

And flying… Flying. Could get interesting. 2 kids and total of 13 hours in the air and a long time traveling. Hopefully they’ll sleep on the plane, I’m sure they will. Hopefully I will… I spoke to my doctor and he will give me “bag of tranquilizers” when I go there in a couple of weeks! Hope they work! I have a great of flying. Might be worth mentioning that. It’s become better in recent years. But I’ve already had anxiety about it so night be good to get some help.

“So many women”

This above is one of the reasons why I think it’s important to add women to the tech industry, that a good with a mix of people “changes the atmosphere for the better”.

Big companies know this, and they know a diverse work force = profit due to higher productivity and creativity. Plus the industry is screaming for people to employ, there’s not enough men, we need to look at other groups in society to fill the demand .

Unrelated, but still funny, a manager at a company I’ve been at half screamed when another manager was complaining about not finding resources to hire;

“What is the problem? It’s not like the earth is emptied out of people looking for employment – find someone and teach them!”

I love that! I believe it’s a big problem that some trying to recruit are blinded by their interpretation and bias of what competence is and can’t look beyond stereotypes.

Anyway, let’s make a list and start with these points above and then continue to list why this is important (because yes, I hear people all the time claiming is a non-issue);

  1. A diverse group of people creates better working climate. For everyone.
  2. Diverse workforce makes more successful companies ($$$)
  3. Industry need more people at a higher rate that light coloured males can be produced -> look beyond gender and colour and more and encourage & educate.
  4. Bringing in women will push the stereotypes and widen what type competence is valued, and what markets to focus on (things they might forget with a too homogenous group eg Apple health app forgetting period tracker)
  5. Women should have the market opened up for flexible, creative, high paid jobs that are often available in the tech industry. I’m not saying anyone or anything physical is stopping them, but there are reasons why they are not seeking out these types of jobs and when they do they more often quit. These reasons need to be eliminated. The STEM interest young girls show should be continually encouraged. Targeted campaigns to encourage work. I’m so convinced so many women would love programming for example and would be absolute stars at it! It just doesn’t seem to be a natural choice still for one half of the earth’s population. (I say that, but in certain countries diversity looks different..)

I was able to go to Websummit last year, and had the same feeling as the tweeter. It’s great to see so many women in this context! And I know the Websummit team are working hard on it!

The ideal would of course be, to not think about it at all. That it just felt natural. But it’s not really there yet…

That’s my thoughts about the subject now. However, rest assure – I have lots more to say about it.

But I’ll finish off with another tweet considering #2 on my list;

Tray 18

I can’t believe in already on tray 18 of my Invisalign journey, and almost 6 months into it. I only have 10 more trays, but I might get a few correctional ones after that.

It looks like my dentist filed too much on my button row so I’ll need to fix that after all the tests are done… Feels a bit annoying to be honest but I’ll wait and see, maybe it’s a quick fix.

I’ve got really used to the trays so it’s no big deal anymore. I don’t even think about being without them yet. But it won’t be that much longer…

So how about the result? Well the upper teeth are moving a lot now, it’s a huge difference if I compare trays. Also I had this period where there was a lot of tension and like 4 trays in a row broke! But that has passed and I think it’s because the teeth are more straight now. Cant wait for the next few trays to straighten it even more…

I remember through the years sometimes I’ve sat and pushed the teeth with my fingers, I don’t know why it’s not like that could move them permanently. Also I’ve had this habit of pushing the tooth that had been sticking in out with my tongue. It will feel very strange when it’s all straight when the tongue moves over the teeth after this is all done.

Teeth
My teeth are very miscolored unfortunately, but found a whitening filter 😂

Bath house non bather

I’m sitting on the bench at the swimming pool (indoors as there’s thunder outside). I’m was unprepared for my female issues when going here resulting in me not being able to swim. Laaame. I asked when I bought a coffee if they have any tampons to buy, but no.

The really sweet girl in the till offered to run down and check her bag for one – so sweet! That is truly one of the greatest bonding things between women, helping each other out with these things. I said “no thanks” though cause it felt like too much of an effort for her to leave her spot at the café just for me to have a short swim. But very nice of her to offer!

We’re just here for a short swim. I feel stressed out and want to attend my to do list – so stupid. I know I won’t get much done today so why stress. But I have to like actively think about not thinking like that. Grr…

The lights just went out over here, hmm… Strange.

Back pain for tooth ache

Tonight I’m swapping back pain for tooth ache. In changing my Invisalign tray again, tray number 8 here we go. I love the feeling of pressing a new tray on and feeling it pushing the teeth a little bit more toward their new positions.

My back was a little better after some TENS treatment. When I was talking to Jon about it I realised that it must have to do with me being home from work. I think it’s carrying Evelyn. I don’t carry her as much as before obviously, she’s getting older. But she’s also getting heavier. Yesterday I carried her from my parents house home cause she was upset. Ok it probably doesn’t tell you anything how far that is, it’s not far. But it was a challenge.. so that’s probably why my lower back on the right side hurts today. It’s always the same spot. I’m in desperate need of strengthening my core muscles too, that might help.

Anyway, we got so much done today. Jon fixed our car breaks so we have a car again. I tore down all old wallpaper in the upstairs hallway. And Jon did some lists in the kitchen. Little by little we’re making progress.

I use Wunderlist for keeping my to-do lists. So I’ve attacked this summer vacation agile style, doing small tasks every day. It keeps you moving forward even though it might take a while.

Good night now. Kids finally fell asleep… 3 more sleeps until the UK. Yay!

Sunny, back ache update

Hi I’m lying in bed with Evelyn, I got a really sore back. I don’t know what I’ve done. But it might have to do with being with the kids alone all week. And I’ve also been working on removing wallpaper and painting the stairs for the 350th time.

It’s super hot in Sweden as in many other places at the moment. So it’s hard to know what to do. But I seem to have managed to overdo it anyway. I’ve got the TENS machine on so I hope that will help.

We bought a carpet for the stairs and upstairs hallway. But to be able to install it, we need to fix the walls and the stairs first. If we get that done we’ve finally finished with renovating the downstairs (except bathroom and laundry which is not projects we’re planning on anytime soon). Then we can finally do our bedroom and the kids upstairs, so excited for that!